An Open Letter to Kevin Sheilds

Dear Mr. Shields,

My name is Robert Franklin, and I have a column called “Modern Rock Press”, within the blogger.com domain. I am a huge fan of the music you made with My Bloody Valentine, so much in fact, that I actually had a shoegazing band here in North Texas that really tried to personify you and the brilliance herein.
Mr. Shields, you must be aware of what’s going on in the music industry today. My eardrums are constantly being assaulted by manufactured, sugar-coated, producer-written crap flooding terrestrial radio like a Biblical plague, or a Clamydia outbreak in a university dorm, whichever analogy you prefer. The Justin Bieber’s, Kesha’s, and Bruno Mars’ of today’s “pop music” have personified the idea that music isn’t an interpersonal matter anymore, and that it has become a facetious marionette, strung around by wonky suits sporting gold-trimmed business cards, ponytails, soul patches, and imported sports cars. Like Judd Nelson in the movie “Airheads”.
The reason for this comes down to one simple fact – you MUST release a new My Bloody Valentine album… ASAP. I don’t know how much more of this I can take without some kind of payoff. Don’t get me wrong, listening to The Arcade Fire or Bright Eyes is okay, but like anything else in this analogy, it’s more like getting something to “tide you over”.
Loveless came out over twenty years ago, and ever since I first heard it, at the tender age of eight, I have wanted more. The sounds within the album are nothing short of an auditory orgasm, which makes you, sir, in my eyes, a creative genius. I haven’t heard anything even remotely close to the surreal beauty and cognitive euphoria Loveless brings to me, and those I know. Over the years, I have turned so many people on to this album, you’re fan base here in Dallas has to have tripled, at least.
So, please, Kevin Sheilds, sultan of feedback and effects, release the next one already! For the love of God, and the sanity of music, release it already!
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About Robert L. Franklin

Ah, the About Me section - social networking's excuse for you sounding like an elitist prick. Hmm... what to say? What to say?
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