“The myriad of flavors explode on my tongue, shimmy through my mouth, slap my taste buds and call them filthy bastards, and I love it.”
— Stacey Jay, Romeo Redeemed
“For sure, even the worst blowjob is better than, say, sniffing the best rose, watching the greatest sunset, hearing children laugh.”
— Chuck Palahniuk
Happy Steak and Blow Job Day everybody!
Yes, men. We made it! It’s been a whole month since we neutered ourselves for the emotional pleasure of our women. Now, we get the greatest two-fer in the history of mandom.
A fat, juicy steak!
And an incredible, incredible polishing of your dong.
Since this will be the first year I celebrate this beautiful tribute to the male desire, I’m giving in to my creative side and trying to determine how I should go about my first Steak & Blow Job Day. The best part about it? My wife has to oblige. Here are my ideas.
A traditional way to celebrate Steak & Blow Job Day. She prepares a succulent steak dinner, then cleans up while you sit on the couch and consume a beer (or two… or more…). She then approaches, gets on her knees, and pulls your member out, sucking it while you watch sports.
The Black Angus
Basically, it’s a variation on comedian Patton Oswalt’s rant about Black Angus Steakhouse. I haven’t fleshed it out quite yet, but it will involve steak sauce and Cheddar Bacon Bombs.
While laying on the couch, you recline and relax while getting your dick sucked. She simultaneously feeds you steak.
While you eat your steak dinner, she disappears under the table and sucks your dick.
That’s just four ideas I have. All of them sound really good. Let’s just hope the wife thinks the same way.